The best way I can write this post is by sharing my own personal relationship with my mother. It’s the most authentic way to acknowledge her, our bond, and the insights I’ve gained through this journey.

I grew up in a somewhat chaotic and complicated household. My mother divorced my father when I was very young—too young to fully comprehend what was happening, but old enough to sense that something wasn’t right. Even now, I’m not sure how to fully put it into words.

Growing up, I never felt resentment toward my mum for leaving me to be raised by my father. As I moved through different phases of life, with my perspective constantly evolving, my view of my mother remained constant. While everyone else had their own opinions, mine stayed the same. I always felt a deeper understanding of her—a knowing that went beyond surface-level judgments.

As I got older, that inner knowing only solidified. And still, no resentment. Even as I write this, my heart feels cracked open—I’m sharing this with you, vulnerable.

With time, I began to understand something important: My mother had a life before she had me. I don’t know all the details of her past or her upbringing, but I know it was extremely difficult growing up in the rougher areas of the Philippines. But this story isn’t one of pain or loss—it’s one of growth, perspective, compassion, and love.

So, if you’ve ever felt the absence of a mother or struggled with your relationship with her, I want to share something that’s helped me: Deep understanding can bring healing. When we seek to understand—when we let go of resentment and see beyond our hurt—something shifts. And in that shift, we find peace.